From 10th grade dropout to college graduate, Smith staves off personal tragedy, depression to earn degree

Wed, 06/08/2022 - 04:11pm | By: David Tisdale

An ingrown toenail surgery in 1996 sidelined Ronald James Smith’s dreams of football glory in his sophomore year at Perry Central (Mississippi) High School. Being taken off the team’s roster was just too much for the Beaumont native to cope with, so he left school.

“When the coaches took up my football equipment and I had to clean out my locker, it felt like the end of the world,” Smith said.

Fast forward to May 2022, and Smith had come full circle, completing his student teaching practicum – ironically, working with 10th grade students – to wrap up the final requirement for his bachelor’s degree in history with social studies licensure at The University of Southern Mississippi (USM).

In between that fateful decision to drop out of high school, ongoing struggles with depression and anxiety and a series of personal tragedies threatened to derail the promise he ultimately kept to his wife on her hospital deathbed - that he would turn his life around and be the best example of a man he could be for their son.

The day his wife Candace died started out joyously when their five-month-old son suddenly extended his arms to reach out, for the first time, to his mother. But just a few hours later, joy turned to tragedy as Smith witnessed his wife suffer an asthma attack. Later that evening she was gone, leaving him with their young son to care for on his own.

“I had always suffered from depression, but I was in a really bad place mentally after my wife passed away,” Smith said.

In addition to being shackled with grief, Smith’s prospects for success in life were dim. Without even a high school diploma and no other education and job training, his chances of moving on to provide a good, stable home for their son looked less than promising. At the time, he was working as a bouncer at Hattiesburg nightclubs.

“I was throwing people out of bars for a living,” Smith said. “I wanted my son to be proud of his dad, and I couldn’t do that working at clubs.”

Tragedy turned to hope for Smith, as he reached deep within himself to find the determination he needed to be that positive role model for his son. The unlikely inspiration came from where he experienced his first great disappointment - the football field at Perry Central, where he looked up to his coaches and wanted to follow in their footsteps, motivating young men on the field and educating students in the classroom. He decided he would pursue a college degree to do just that.

“When I was young, I wanted to be a history teacher, like some of my coaches were,” Smith said. “Even having to leave the football team and then quitting school, I still looked up to and loved those guys and wanted to be like them one day.”

Smith’s first step was to secure his GED (General Educational Development) certification and then enroll at then Jones County Junior College (now Jones College), where he secured his basic course credits, including – what he considered miraculous at the time – passing college algebra.

“I was never good in math in school, had never passed a math test, and then to accomplish that…I’m a big guy, 6-foot 3 inches, but I was crying tears of joy when I got my final grade,” he said.

Smith then entered USM and chose its history with teacher licensure credential degree program. He found not only inspiration but invaluable support from its faculty.

In his final semester, he was assigned to student teach 10th grade students in the Jones County School System, which Smith said was “like going from one extreme to the other,” reflecting on how he had left school at the same age. “It blew my mind (when he received the assignment). I loved my student teaching experience.”

But even through college, tragedy and other personal challenges continued stalking him. Three more close family members passed away, including his father from cancer, with whom he became closer in later years through their mutual love of USM football; his sister, who died in a car accident; and a beloved grandmother. He had to withdraw from school one semester to care for his son as he recovered from a medical emergency.

Smith cleared these hurdles to keep on track for his degree, the vow he made to Candace and love for his son fueling his drive - even on those days he wanted to give up, like his high school sophomore self.

“The teachers at USM are the best in the world, I’m telling you, they are great. They kept me motivated to keep coming back, to not give up,” he said. “I probably wouldn’t have made it without them. (USM professors) Dr. (Max) Grivno, Dr. (Matthew) Casey, Dr. Bradley Phillis, Dr. (Joe) Weinberg, Dr. (Brian) LaPierre – I want to be like these people when I teach.”

Mastering time management in his final semester at USM was crucial, but Smith again answered the call, with help from family members looking after his son during the day. “In addition to preparing classroom lessons, and then getting his (son’s) dinner prepared, making sure he gets his bath and ready for school the next day, the spring semester was pretty challenging,” he said.

Jeremy Gentry, one of Smith’s supervising teachers in the Jones County School District, said he looks forward to seeing him realize his goal of becoming an educator.

“Ronald showed great enthusiasm and excitement to soon be able to join our profession, and I wish him well in his future endeavors,” Gentry said.

Smith wasn’t shy about sharing his life experiences with his students, partly in hopes to convince them not to make some of the same choices he did.

“With what I’ve been through, I have a different perspective than, say, someone who just graduated from college in their early 20s,” he said. “I told them (students), ‘Don’t do like I did – it’s a lot easier to stay on track when you’re younger than me, at age 41.”

Smith’s longtime passion for history began when his father would take him to the Vicksburg National Military Park, at the site of the Civil War Battle of Vicksburg, He’s also fascinated with the story off Union Army Commander and 18th President of the United States, Ulysses S. Grant, seeing one parallel between them in that the war hero’s career up until he was age 39 had been unremarkable, until he was called on to lead the Union forces.

“His story always stood out to me, that so much can change for the better in your life, no matter how old you are,” Smith noted. “I draw a lot of inspiration from that and in how my own situation has evolved.”

Dr. Phillis, who is coordinator of the History program’s teacher licensure track, lauded Smith for his hard work in the classroom at USM and with his student teaching assignment, as well as his determination to weather his personal storms.

“Ron’s perseverance through the many intellectual and emotional challenges of student teaching testify to his commitment to bettering the lives of middle and high school students in Mississippi as a social studies teacher,” Phillis said. “I look forward to following his career.”

Rhett Ladner was one of Smith’s coaches at Perry Central. He stayed connected with Smith even after he dropped out of school and is proud of how he’s turned his life around.

“I remember the first time I saw James Smith in New Augusta, Mississippi on a hot August day. I was a young football coach and James was a 6'3", 300-pound ninth grader,” said Ladner, now assistant superintendent for secondary schools with the Pascagoula-Gautier School District. “He was so big we didn't have pants to fit him. He was a kid with a smile and a heart bigger than anyone I had ever met and loved the game of football. He had so many challenges in and out of school, but he never let them dim the flame that burned in his eyes and heart.

“When James eventually dropped out of high school, it broke my heart. We continued to stay in touch, and he would always say, ‘Coach, I'm going to make it. And I will be a teacher and coach like you.’ Our relationship eventually grew into a friendship, and I saw him lose his wife to a tragic death; he persevered through that and has led others who lost their loved ones through the grief process. As a single dad, he has set a fine example of determination. He never lost sight of his dream of being a history teacher and coach that makes kids' lives better, and he inspires me every day to be a better person and never give up.”

Smith says many of the people he knew when he dropped out of high school are in disbelief at his turnaround. “I was always the class clown, so a lot of them (high school classmates) are shocked now to see what I’ve done. Shocked, but proud.

“If you had told them then that I would wind up going to college, getting a degree and becoming a teacher, they would have laughed at you.”

In addition to his plans to teach, Smith is also a certified grief coach, having pursued training online to help others dealing with personal tragedy like himself. He started an online grief support community not long after his wife’s death that began with about 10 people and now numbers in the thousands and growing.

Smith walked across the stage Friday, May 13 at Reed Green Coliseum to pick up his diploma, flipping the script on superstition and bad fortune – he’s already faced down some of the worst life can throw at you. And he made good on his promise to Candace.

“The only reason I made it, the only way I got to make it onto that stage to get my diploma and shake (USM President) Dr. (Rodney D.) Bennett’s hand, is because a lot of people saw the good in me, believed in me, worked with me, and gave me a chance,” he said. “I’m so blessed.”

And what’s the lesson everyone can learn from Smith’s story? Don’t give up. Ever.

“At age 15, you don’t – you can’t – see the big picture of your life, like when I dropped out of high school. You’ve got to keep painting that picture, keep at it until you get where you ultimately want to be.”

Just a few days before graduation, his son, “Little James” as he’s known to everyone in Smith’s family, came up to him and said “Dad, I’m proud of you.”

“That meant so much to me. I teared up,” Smith recounted. “That got to me pretty good.”